Like a lot of people, my first thought in the morning is "Just give me the coffee and no one gets hurt." I have been indulging in the amazing healing elixir that I believe comes straight from the Heavens since I was, oh, four years old. Now, now, before you decide my precious Italian mother should get a good finger wagging, know this: "Kid coffee" in our house was warm milk with sugar and a splash of something vaguely reminiscent of what I NOW drink. My mom's coffee was WAY different then - before we bought our own Kona or Columbia beans and ground them well. Before we knew that "good" coffee actually had more than a tablespoon of grounds in a 10-cup pot. Oh, well, live and learn. I digress.
I am compelled by the Holy Spirit to take a journey and I am asking you, gentle reader, to take a journey with me. I believe I am led to share with you my journey to, through and hopefully out of depression, panic and anxiety disorder. There are different opinions amongst my inner circle of trust as to when we actually "set out " on the journey but most in that circle know of it - at least in part as they are living the inadequacies of a physically and emotionally broken body.
There is a lot to share and a lot I want to learn about all that God is allowing me to go through on this journey. I feel a kinship with King David and Job and understand truly what the Apostle Paul spoke about when he referred in the 2nd Letter to the Church at Corinth, Chapter 12, beginning in verse 7 to the thorn in his flesh that he had been given as a messenger from Satan - to keep him, essentially from getting "too big for his britches" about all the Good that Paul was allowed to be a part of. Although Paul prayed (the scripture says that Paul BEGGED) for this "thorn" to be taken from Him, God, in verse 9 said to Paul each time "My gracious favor is all you need. My power works best in your weakness." So now I am glad to boast about my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may work through me." Oh, my friends - I know that God's grace is sufficient as I can look back and see that His grace and His mercy have covered me, The Bear, the Man Cubs, our Daughter in Love and all of those we are privileged to have on the Journey with us.
This morning in my quiet time, I was directed to Psalm 42. While I know deer pants for water and my morning human screams for COFFEE, more than anything I need to NEED the Almighty as I know that God and God alone has the grace sufficient to see me through every step of this journey. Lamentations 3:23 reminds us that God's mercies are renewed afresh every day. There are days dear ones that I cannot do more than move from one sleeping place to another and I need someone to remind me to drink water. Other days, my feet hit the floor and Satan says "Uh, oh, she's up!" I have nothing to offer you other than what I have learned and what I am learning but this one thing I know: God does not leave us here helpless. He can heal. He will heal, in His way, in His time, for His glory. And thankfully, along the way, the deer get water. And we get Jesus, grace sufficient for the thorns, daily renewing mercies. And coffee. Love you. A2
Scripture Reference Courtesy of www.crosswalk.com